Showing posts with label Fred Flintstone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fred Flintstone. Show all posts

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Sideball

"Why is sideboob so tastefully erotic, while sideball is horrifying?!" - Gypsy B (extremely paraphrased) regarding her first experience at a live drag race (the tranny kind in high heels, not the automotive kind).

Sideball (side Ewok?) became my secret nickname for my Halloween costume this year. I expected the costume to be the most popular costume of the year, so I didn't think it would turn out being very special. Over the years, I feel like we've done quite well for ourselves in our costume efforts, including a Fred Flintstone costume that sparks fear in all who experienced it in person. ;)

Thanks, Beekeeper.
I was going for shock value, and I didn't know how well our new group of friends would take it here in the Tri-Cities. However, when we woke up the morning after the party, our Facebook photo had blown up with over 200 Likes. We must have done something right.


I made our costumes. We found Annie's white suit at Goodwill, which I painted black with duct tape and 3 bottles of fabric spray paint. My top was found at Goodwill, but it was a tank, so I had to trim it. My bottoms are "undershapers" (spanks) from the maternity department at Walmart. Miss S, my friend and hairstylist, did the hair for me the first time. The hand, which was waiting for us in the car at the time of the photo shoot, was made from 3 pieces of construction paper and some cardboard reinforcement.

It barely survived 2 weekends of partying.
Considering the popularity of our costumes, and the most popular Facebook photo (almost 300 Likes now) either of us had ever had (which is saying something, because I'm, well.... popular), we decided to put it to the test and head to one of the two local clubs for their costume contest the following weekend. This time, Annie did my hair, but she did a fair enough job. Didn't matter, cuz we swept both the boys' and girls' costume divisions, getting us $25 cash and a VIP party for 18 for each of us. That'd be the 2nd time we've won a costume contest at a bar, though the last time we actually won 'worst costume' and only because we had a huge, loud group of people with us. The girl beside us in a homemade, shitty Narwal costume truly deserved to win the category.

It's always pleasantly surprising when your work turns out to be more epic than you could have ever expected. I feel like we've set the bar too high for next year among the villagers here, so we'll probably just have to move again.

Happy Belated Halloween,
~RoB

P.S. I did clean up Cheetos stains off of my outfit before taking it out to the competition. They were on my underboobs.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Halloween Costumes

'round these parts, Halloween is a big deal.  By here, I mean Annie and I.  Not that we're big drag queens looking for the excuse to dress like a chick, get our nails done, put on our Womens' size 14 platforms, and paint the town.  Not that at all... not anymore at least.  That was so middle school / high school / couple of weekends in college...

Anyway, Halloween has been pretty fun since going to college (these photos really need no captions):

Most fitting costume I'll ever wear. Should've said 'Nozzle'.

Obligatory college toga costume.

My eyes are up here.
Yes, I'm in roller skates. (I have a scar.)

And Annie and I have done a pretty good job at couples costumes:



I could only find a pic at a bad part in the night...
At the end of last year, Annie came up with a brilliant idea for this year.  If we pull it off, it'll be quite fucking awesome.  Mostly because I look so much like the male-role in a famous cartoon couple.  I'll leave your mind to wander until I announce what we chose with pictures in early November.

The problem?  We've got high expectations.  You've got high expectations.  Wherever we go will have high expectations.  We've been trying to land the role as 'that couple' during Halloween festivities over the years, and our performance will have to be stellar.  How are we going to pull this off in the one free weekend we have between now and Halloween?

We've tried to make our costumes or find things at thrift shops that work (more Annie than I).  I think this is the first year where it would be totally possible for me to put my ensemble together without buying the professional costume, it'll just take a lot of work.  And some sewing.  I'm not very familiar with either of these concepts.

I hope we live up to my expectations, and that'll mean that you'll enjoy the costumes,
~RoB

P.S. Annie would be upset if I didn't tell this story.  Up toward the top you'll see a picture of me in shorty-shorts and roller skates.  While rollin' with my homies around Ann Arbor, some guy at a bar yelled something to the extent of "Dude, that chick's on skates."  This was responded to with "Dude, that chick's a dude."  She hasn't let that drop yet.  Not the first time I was mistaken for a lady.

P.S.S. The first time I was mistaken for a lady:  I literally did dress as a girl for Halloween for a few years in middle school.  The last time was probably 8th grade.  My cousin and I showed up to a lady's porch and yelled "Trick or Treat".  She came out with candy (best holiday ever).  She then went on to ask me what I was supposed to be.  In the deepest voice that I was able to muster at the time, I said, "a girl".  In almost a shriek, she replied, "Dear Jesus!"  I must've been pulling it off quite well.  I got almost two handfuls of confused adults by the time the night was over.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Fred Flintstone Poetry


There once was a guy dressed as Fred
whose girlfriend sprayed her hair red.
He thought it'd be fun
if he too sprayed his gun.
So good times were waiting ahead.


The party was Halloween Prog.
There was Spongebob and Scooby the dog.
A drink at each stop,
and you drink 'til you drop,
but the drinking was just a prologue.


They drank and drank and drank some more.
Fred passed out once and b'gan to snore.
It was quite a test
as they all progressed.
Fred managed to follow next door.


Fluorescent: the type of hair dye
Fred made Betty use for her guise.
At the end of the night
the dye glowed in black light.
So Fred decided to flash all nearby.


All near now have PTSD
because Fred flashed his wee-wee.
To the part he held true,
yelling 'yabba-dabba-do!'
Will a night beat this ever? Maybe!