Monday, January 28, 2013

Following a Cop

Who here does not immediately start to freak out when there's a cop behind them while they're driving?  Nobody?  Didn't think so.  We all do it.  My heart races as soon as a cop pulls out behind me, even if I have nothing to do with the situation.  One time, a cop peeled out from the shoulder of the freeway, drove up behind me, turned on his lights, and when I started to pull over (assuming I'd been caught), he pulled over the car directly in front of me.

Heart.... racing.......
OMG, cop!  Drop the phone.  What's my speed?  Of course I'm speeding.  Maybe he won't notice if I hit my brakes real quick.  Did he see that?  Is my seatbelt on?  Have I been drinking?  Before I know it, the car speeds past me to get to whatever he needed to get to.  I don't know, maybe Krispy Kreme just turned on their 'now destroying arteries' sign.  Why do I freak out every single time?!

But what if he's got a friend around here somewhere?  Am I entering a speed trap?  Did I use my blinker to turn on here?  Was that even a cop, or was it just some old lady in a white Crown Victoria?  Has he been following me?

Bum... bump.... bum... bump....
What I really want to know is, would they notice if we were following them?  Would there be any point where they might start to freak out?

The other day I was heading to downtown Lexington, using my preferred plethora of back roads to avoid stop lights.  A cop turned right on a red light just before I crossed the intersection, so I was directly behind him.  It appeared that we had the same route in mind.  After 3 or 4 turns, I started to wonder about this very subject.  Had he noticed that I appeared to be following him?  What if I was some renegade gang-banger looking to get my revenge on the copper that shot my baby-mama.  Did that make his heart start to race?

I hope so, 'cuz I owe 'em a few,

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

My 5 on Both Sides

A running joke that we have in my current group of friends is our 'list of five'.  You get to pick 5 celebrities that your spouse would allow you to have sex with (no strings attached) if given the opportunity.  I feel like my list changes hourly, but this is probably the most consistent.

A few notes.  SMG moved up a spot (or down, here) after Google Image Searching her (damn!).  Also, there are a ton of honorable mentions that have made their way on and off:  Shannon Tweed, Anna Farris, Amy Adams, Pam Anderson, Rachel Roxx, Mila Kunis, and Monique Gabrielle, to name a few.

5.  Reese Witherspoon
I like younger & thicker.  Fear, Cruel Intentions, Legally Blonde.

4.  Isla Fisher
So distractingly (made up word) hot in Wedding Crashers.

3.  Sarah Michelle Gellar
Hot as Buffy.  Hotter in Cruel Intentions.

2.  Geri Halliwell
I've already done a post about her.

1.  Emma Stone
Something about those huge eyes (and red hair).  The opposite of yellow fever?

Then, I awoke on Monday morning after a weird, dirty dream with Channing Tatum.  I don't think I've ever really considered Tatum hot.  It did make me realize that if Annie were a guy, and all we did was blow each other all of the time, we'd probably never leave the house or have friends or be able to pay bills.  That's all gay guys do, right?... just blow each other all the time...

Monday morning, a friend posted this photo on Facebook, and I took it as a sign.  I've always been open about the fact that I find some guys hot.  (My current #1 has been at the top of my list for as long as I can remember.)  So, here goes my list of 5 on the guy side (Brody on gLee and David Beckham's Armani underwear shoot [just the shoot] are honoarable mentions):

5.  Channing Tatum
I've never actually seen Magic Mike.

4.  Chris Hemsworth
Only if he's bulked up like Thor.

3.  Taylor Lautner
He'll have to pretend to be Jacob.

2.  Chris Pine
Strangely unattractive shirtless...

1.  Mark Wahlberg
I think it has to do with the movie Fear.
So, there ya go, a post everybody can enjoy,

Wednesday, January 9, 2013


I love wine.  I had a fling with tequila between the summers of 2007 and 2008, but wine has been my only long-term relationship (with alcohol).  The closest thing I've ever come to drinking cocktails were Tequila Sunrises (during that bout with tequila) and the Jack-n-Cokes I get every time I'm at a bar.  They're simple, sweet, and alcoholic.  Who could ask for more!

This year for Annie's birthday (the day the Maya calendar supposedly ended), we fought through a blizzard to take The Art of the Cocktail at The Ritz-Carlton, Lake Tahoe.  Only our group of 4 (us and her parents) and 2 other guests actually made it to the class, so we did it at the bar of the Manzanita instead of in the Living Room Restaurant.  There we had their two top bartenders giving us the secrets behind their most popular drinks.  I got pretty drunk... I think it was the altitude.  We took the recipes home, tweaked them to our tastes, experimented with friends, and now I'll list the recipes for the 4 cocktails that got us through the holidays.

We bought all of the tools necessary to make these cocktails, like a cocktail shaker, jigger, & strainer.

Since I'm using a jigger, all of my proportions are in ounces, but yours could just as easily be in tsp or Tbsp or shots or whatever you want.  That's the convenience of proportions, so I'll just leave them as such.

Annob's Sidecar (this makes 2)
1 Cointreau
2 Simple Syrup (if you want less sweet, make this 1)
2 Lemon Juice
4 Brandy
Shaken and strained into two dry martini glasses, or in our case, a wine glasses.
(If you're feeling fancy, use 1 orange for 1 lemon and drop a spiral of orange peel in the glass.)

Annob's Moscow Mule
2 Vodka
~6 Ginger Beer (usually I split a can/bottle between roughly two drinks)
Stirred with a cinnamon stick, leaving the cinnamon stick in the glass.

Annob's Margarita
1 Cointreau
1 Lime Juice
1 Orange Juice
2 Simple Syrup
3 Tequila
Shaken and strained into a salt- or sugar-rimmed glass.

Annob's Keeneland Breeze
2 Bourbon
2 Cointreau
6-8 Ginger Ale

It's shameful for us to take any credit at all for these classic/standard drinks, but we did play with the recipes we were given.  You could order a Sidecar, Moscow Mule, or Margarita at just about any respectable bar, and who knows, maybe they'll be better!  Keeneland Breeze is a cocktail from the Keeneland horse-racing track in Lexington.

As far as the cocktail recipes are concerned, all fruit juices are fresh-squeezed.  Lime and lemon juice are completely interchangeable.  You can even replace the orange juice in the Margarita with lime.  Cointreau can be replaced with Grand Marnier with little distinction in taste.  I just like to keep Cointreau around for when I make buttercream.  The cheapest Brandy you can find works for the Sidecar, we use Christian Brothers VS (the same brand I use in my Sangria).  You can use the cognac of your choice, as well.  We use Bulleit Bourbon and Absolut Vodka.  I've used 1800 Reposado for my Tequila in the past, but currently we're using Espolon Reposado.  Goslings is the standard Ginger Beer, but I'm really digging Regatta for its extra fresh-ginger spiciness.  It might be too much for some, though.  Finally our simple syrup is just half sugar and half water.  No boiling required.  Just use warm water, shake it up, let it dissolve for a few seconds, shake it up again, and drop it in the fridge to remove the cloudiness.

I'll be honest, I hated vodka until I discovered the Moscow Mule.  Also, we bought a muddler to work on things like lemon drops and mint juleps, but we focused on these 4 drinks instead.


Thursday, January 3, 2013

New Year's Resolutions

New Year's Resolutions are stupid.  I can't think of a single one that I've stuck to.  Here is my list of 3 simple NYRs for 2010 (which I posted in a note on Facebook in December 2009):
1. Put my clean laundry away the same day that I do it.
2. Six day work weeks at school.
3. Do not charge anything to credit cards.
Each of these, individually, could really help my life. If I manage to do all three, I should be a clean, debt-free Dr. Rob in no time at all!
I honestly don't think I succeeded at any of those through the entire month of January.  I had charged things by January 15th.  I started living out of my laundry basket after my birthday (February 15th), and I dropped out of school in December...

I think NYRs are so stupid that I didn't even attempt them in 2011, but I will try them again now.  Since Schoolhouse Rock taught me that 3 is the magic number, here goes:
  1. Blog at least twice a month.  (Or give up blogging entirely.  There's really only one or the other at this point.)
  2. Save 10% of the money that I make.  (I've tried this several times throughout my life, and I've failed miserably every time.  I'm genetically trained to live paycheck-to-paycheck.  However, I have to start learning to save, or I'll have to work until I die.)
  3. Find a job where I'm making a significant portion of the household income.  (I've had a sweet deal with Annie for a while.  I think she's had enough of it.  She hasn't complained once, but I think she's ready to share finances instead of being solely responsible for them.)
So, here goes.  We'll know by January 15th if I've failed the first one...

It's amazing how much that single video has stuck with me my whole life,