Podcasts

I drive ~39 minutes one-way to work.  I did the same commute in the summer of 2008, and I was almost excited to catch back up on all of my podcasts.  My enthusiasm ran out as quickly as my podcasts did.  The only things that I regularly listened to before this summer were: Bill Burr's Monday Morning Podcast, Freakonomics, and This American Life.  I highly recommend the latter two to everyone, but the first one is more up my alley than most people's.

Anyway, I went on a rampage of trying new podcasts.  I'm really happy with them some, and I have a few that I'd like to say aren't so good..  Car Talk is amazing, and How Stuff Works is super interesting.  Planet Money hits an interest that I've only recently come across: economics, so I listen to that regularly.  Adam Corolla's podcast sucked, so I really don't understand why it is so popular..  I've unsubscribed to TED Talks (stupid without video) and Comedy Central (same problem).  ESPN's B.S. Report and Jillian Michaels' podcast didn't do if for me, either.  A new podcast from the producers of WWDTM! has been pretty good, and its called How to Do Everything.

I'm a big fan of Doug Loves Movies, but I don't think I've correctly guessed a single movie yet from the Leonard Multin game.  I tried Jordan, Jesse Go!, but I don't think that I get it.  Not really my thing.  I'm also trying to settle on Sklarboro Country.  I'm a big fan of the Sklar Bros, but hearing them (instead of being able to look at them) as they continuously switch between each other is almost too much for my brain.  I like their interviews, though, so I'll probably keep trying.  Joe Rogan's podcast is just too long, he gets too long winded on some of his crazy rants, and I get distracted every time I think about the Fleshlight.  Bring back in the long list of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me! and Napa Valley Wine Radio 'casts that I allowed to build up in my iPhone, and I've got quite the fleet of entertaining sound bites to get me from here to work and back each day.

I've also learned some really important things from these podcasts over the last few months:

• How to Do Everything taught me that the only sure-fire way to get rid of hiccups is to stick your finger up in your butthole and tickle the inside a little bit.  Think about that next time you have the hiccups.
• Doug <3s Movies taught me that Johnny Knoxville lost a tooth to a high-velocity dildo while filming Jackass 3D.
• Doug Loves Movies also taught me that a taping of Mr. Belvedere was shut down early because Christopher Hewett sat on his own balls.  (He also had another instance where he fell out of a harness during a production of Peter Pan and landed on his balls... stopping production for another day.)  Pretty much, we learned that Mr. Belvedere had gigantic testicles.
• Planet Money, on a more serious note, has taught me that nobody in the world knows what the fuck they are doing when it comes to the economy.
• Oh, and How to Do Everything taught me that Annie is just as awkward on the radio as she is in real life.

BB's MMPC makes me think the word 'cunt' alot, to myself, too,
~RoB

Porn at Work

I don't know how things were when the internet first got going (I was a child), but I imagine it was easy for employees to roam cyberspace freely whenever their jobs included computer work.  It was super slow, so it didn't really matter.

Before long, employers bought software and hired IT people to control the websites that people could access at work.  No ebay, no facebook, no porn.  Wtf?  "The internet is for porn."

Well, the power has returned to the people!  Why?  Smart phones.

The other day I opened up my iPhone for something, and it still had a porn page open.  I giggled.  (You can lie to yourself and judge, or you can google 'iPhone Porn'.)

I didn't actually watch any, but I could.  Most of us can.  That's simultaneously screwed up and refreshing.  There's zero accountability now.  I can put in headphones and you wouldn't even know.  I could be sitting at my desk watching porn right now.  Or now.  I know I am not the first person to figure this out.  I pray that Michael Scott isn't taking advantage of this down the hall.

Do you have any clue what your boss is doing in his office with his door closed at this very moment?
~RoB

(He/she's probably shopping on eBay.  Bosses don't have sex drives, but they make more money.)

Pee & Ugly People

I've apparently started a bad habit.  I promise to stop once I bring this last load up from L.A. Sunday night.  The worst part was Annie got off in about 15 minutes.  She apparently doesn't check her text messages while driving.  Geez, people.  We have this technology to use!  By the way, Bay Area traffic is almost as frustrating as L.A. traffic.  I also memorized that some kid was abducted in a Silver Toyota Corolla license plate 6BHW445; it was all over the freeway during my ridiculous amount of driving today.

Back to pee, whenever I do it in my car, I feel so redneck.  It reminds me when I drove to Chicago with a friend in high school, borrowing my grandpa's truck.  We found a jug of pee in the door.  Upon returning, he explained that when he's driving to work and throwing back a few brewskies (yes, simultaneously), he prefers to pee in a jug as opposed to stopping to pee somewhere.  Awesome.  No big surprise for a guy who has a big detergent tub in our garage for peeing into.  I'm so white trash!  Guess this gets put into the same category as peeing in the shower: weird urinating habits.  Maybe I do have some sort of problem...

On another note, I forgot how funny looking the people were in the bay area.  You get so spoiled in L.A.  Everyone is so hot!  I mean, at least people in the bay are skinny (skinny, not in good shape) unlike the herds of buffalo you find in the Midwest.  They're just funny looking.  I know that I'm plain ugly, and that I'm certainly not sporting a six-pack, but it is us ugly people that end up being the shallowest, since we learn quite young how much physical attractiveness factors into the ease of daily life.

Applied to 8 more jobs today, totaling 31 so far.  Heard back from 3 tutoring places, but I haven't made any commitments.  I'm driving to L.A. tomorrow, so I have some time off from the job search.  We have tickets to the U.S. soccer match, and I'm dying to go to Scarpetta before leaving L.A. permanently.  I'm considering flying back to MI to visit granny (and my cuz) who are both in the hospital now.  I think that's it for my life today.

Funny looking,
~RoB

Edwin & Eloise

Meet Edwin & Eloise.

It's a tradition in Annie's family that all the girls take off the day after Christmas and spend the day shopping.  They go around trying to take advantage of 50% off all the crap that's left after the holiday shopping season.  Two years ago, Annie's mom walked back in with Edwin & Eloise, the evil, possessed, stuffed deer that spend the nights walking around and whispering cruel things in my ear.

This year, Annie's house was so packed with people that we had to spend a few nights on her living room floor next to Edwin & Eloise.  I kept covering them with clothes so that they wouldn't be hovering over me while I slept.  Several times, the clothes were removed before the next morning.  This was the first solid proof that I had that these screwed up stuffed dolls were alive.  Nobody believed me.

Finally, a few days ago, I returned by myself to find them doing the nasty.  So, I snapped a few pics on my iPhone in hopes of once, and for all, proving to the world that these demon deer should be destroyed!

Other than that, my life remains a whirlwind, though Tahoe was a nice break.  I've applied to 17 jobs so far, and I have at least 6 more to apply to today.  I've spoken on the phone to a lab that plans on giving me an offer before the end of the week.  I am also meeting with a tutoring company tomorrow.  So, things are moving on that front.

Granny ended up back in the hospital, ICU specifically.  Today she was moved out of ICU, but things don't sound well.  I'm considering flying back home next week to spend some time.  Maybe seeing me will help her along, cuz I am her favorite person in the world.  My cousin (my age) just ended up in the same hospital for thyroid problems.  What's going on people???

I took a skating (type of skiing) lesson up at Tahoe, and it's something that I'd like to try a few more times.  I regularly stride when I'm cross-country skiing up there, but learning the faster and more modern style could be fun.  I'm considering doing the Great Ski Race in March, which is a 30k race.  We'll see if I'm in good enough shape by then.  I'm playing tennis with an old friend today, so that's a start.

That's enough for today.  It's hard to blog in Tahoe, but I should have a few consistent days of it this week before I return to L.A. to get the last of my stuff!

Still scared to fart,
~RoB