Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Naked Roommate

What differentiates a nudist from someone who just likes to be naked?  Anything?

Let's start by clarifying that I don't think I'm physically attractive.  Though I am fairly happy with all parts of my body below my waistline (minus some acne and a few random patches of hair), I feel like my top half really brings down the total value.  I really don't think people should have to look at me naked, nor would I expect anyone to take pleasure in it.  That being said; I am naked all of the time.  Not in a sexual way.  I just like to come home from work, take off the big kid clothes, and walk around in my birthday suit.

This kind of makes me an awful roommate, though I don't think that my 3rd roommate knows.  (She's been unfortunate enough to see me in a towel and maybe my boxers a few times, but no major incidents yet.)  Annie certainly knows, and those close to her should send their condolences.  I feel like if we were ever to break up, the biggest catalyst (or habit she would take pleasure in ridding from her life) would be my almost-constant nudity.  If you have ever been in our apartment, you've stood where naked ~RoB has stood.  If you've ever sat on anything, chances are naked ~RoB has, too (except our dining room table, cuz those chairs aren't comfy for naked peeps).  I cook naked sometimes, I've cleaned the bathroom naked, I've worked out naked, I sleep naked, and I generally loiter around sans clothing.

I rarely think of it, but I've wondered a few times if anyone can ever see me through the windows.  It gets hot in our apartment this time of year, so I'm a big advocate of keeping our windows open for the breeze to flow through.  But is that exposing some of our poor neighbors to naked ~RoB, too?

I know two people from college that were self-proclaimed nudists.  Seriously.  But what is it that pushes you to make that last step and proclamation?  I have no interest in joining a colony.  I love volleyball, but I have no intention of ever playing it naked (my Herbal Essences bottles tell me that is the #1 pastime for nudist colonies).  Aside from some drunken incidents, I don't really have much interest in showing the whole world my penis.  Unless you ask.  Or happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Or happen to have eyes.

So, am I a nudist, or does everyone do this (except Annie)?

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