Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Things I'm Learning in Lexington

1. Driving.  People stay behind the line until they are fully prepared to make a left turn.  I'm one of those people that creep out into the intersection waiting for a gap in traffic.  One of those people that always turns left on yellow.  They don't really do that here.  Don't they have anywhere to go?

2. Vernacular.  "Y'all" can be used to refer to a single person.  I'm the only left at the dog park, because you are leaving.  It's perfectly acceptable to say, "Y'all have a good day."  Well, I guess, 'we all' will.

3. Interwebz.  People just don't really use the internet.  When we tell some local Mom-and-Pop shop that we found their store online, they're always blown away.  Expect to get funny looks if you say anything like "Urbanspoon" or "Yelp".  No room for that kind of funny talking here.

4. Horses.  One of the main roads surrounding the cooler parts of Lexington is called Man O' War.  Dedication to some war vet?  Nope, a famous racing horse.  Horses are fucking everywhere.  Ok.  Not really having sex, but everywhere, nonetheless.  Horse capital of the world, I've heard.

5. History.  I was walking along a road parallel to Main St. downtown.  There are a few things over there, like the Opera House, but nothing that spectacular.  Bam!  I find a historical marker that says "In this house, Mary Todd Lincoln (Abraham's wife) was born in 1818 and spent her childhood."  Random.  (All states around here take some major claim to Lincoln, but we all know which state puts him on the license plate.)

This is apparently inside along the $18 tour.
6. Driving.  These people have to be some of the worst drivers I've seen.  Keep in mind that I've lived in Los Angeles, New Jersey, and near the Ohio border.  On several occasions I've thought, "Is that a student driver without a sign?"  The fire trucks are always pulling out of their nearby station to go rescue people from car accidents.  There isn't a very big population here, and there's plenty of room to drive.  Stop running into each other!  (And that old lady needs to turn off her damn blinker, turn on her damn lights, and turn off her damn wipers.)

7.  Food.  I expected fried chicken.  I didn't expect Ethiopian or Sushi.  Turns out they don't have Ethiopian, but they have some successful sushi restaurants.  Every roll is either partially or completely cooked, but it's a start.  I've already had some of the best biscuits and gravy of my life.  Oh, and the Kentucky Fried Chickens in Kentucky have all-you-can-eat buffets.  Hellz yeah!  I'll have everything in one bowl smothered in cheese, please.  Thanks.  Now I'll have another.

As Annie likes to say, "Colonial Buffet".

8. Accents.  Until proven otherwise, I will continue to subtract IQ points from anyone with a southern accent.  Look at a map.  You're in the Midwest.  I don't know why that accent starts in the middle of Ohio.  Not that there aren't smart people here, just none that drawl.

9. Fast Food.  It's king.  I'm flabbergasted at the amount of fast food everywhere, and how much everyone eats it.  People line up for each meal of the day.  It makes a normal person queasy.

10. Walking.  Nobody does it.  I feel like people are peeking through the windows thinking "Who is that weirdo" as I'm walking by.  A cop drove by as I was walking a mile to a bakery, and I seriously thought he was going to pull over and say something.  He was giving me the stink eye.

11. Thunderstorms.  Angel's never been in one, and we've already had some crazy weather.  He is not happy.

But oh how I missed being surrounded by fat people!

One of the buffalo herd again,


  1. Re: some of your points...

    1.) Even though Kentucky is not geographically "the South", people of the South drive in a way that reflects their general outlook on life: "Why hurry?" It is infuriating to me when I drive around Oklahoma because it seems like they didn't plan where they were going before they left the house, and how they were going to get there. And they drive with no urgency whatsoever.

    2.) Here is Oklahoma, there are multiple uses of the word y'all. It can refer to a singular person, a small group of people, or a large group of people. When referring to a large group of people, they use "all y'all" which I feel is slightly redundant.

    4.) As you've probably surmised, Kentucky is the horse capital of the world, and Lexington is pretty much its capital city. The Kentucky Horse Park (which is in Lexington) is a really great experience, especially if you don't know much about them. Keeneland Racetrack is also there, and it hosts a very well-known (quite possibly world-known) Thoroughbred racehorse auction. The track itself is ranked #1 in North America.

  2. EuroAmerican TransplantMarch 5, 2012 at 11:23 AM

    I can't even begin to tell you how accurate this blog is and I really feel like I could have written it...almost word for word!
    Driving, fast food, no one walking...all of it!!!!
    People were looking at me crazily when I walked to Bdubs the other if it wasn't a\cross the street from where I live!